Posted by: leebase | October 22, 2012

Living on the Corner of Disappointment and Grattitude

I lost 2lbs this past week.  That’s right on target, but my weight loss has clearly slowed down.  Since I’m 60lbs away from goal, it’s very disappointing to be experiencing such a slow down already.  I really can’t see myself eating much less than I do, so spending much more time exercising.

However, don’t fret about my fretting 🙂   There is power in disappointment.  Disappointment drives me to make changes.  Not getting what I want makes me work harder.  I’m ambitious and I’ve spent a lifetime wanting more, wanting to be better, never being satisfied.

Up to a point.  Too much disappointment can lead to discouragement.  Discouragement leads to giving up or giving in.  I monitor my reaction to disappointment and switch over to appreciation.

I love that I’ve blogged about my journey.  When I get disappointed too much, when frustration starts tending to discouragement, I come back to my blog and I review my journey.  I see how far I’ve come.  I see the hurdles I’ve overcome.  I see the progress made that at one time would have seemed unobtainable.

It’s nice to have a happy place to go to.  Thing is, happy-ville carries it’s own risk.  Too much contentment leads to stagnation.

So I try to live at the intersection of disappointment and gratitude.   I try to use the power of each motivation to move me forward toward my goals.  Here’s an example.

My weight loss has indeed slowed down.  I’ve responded by tightening my diet even more and by ratcheting up the intensity of my exercise.  I simply don’t have time for an hour and a half of walking per day like I did just a bit ago.  And the weather isn’t cooperating.  It’s dark and cold and rainy.  So I’ve started training for a 5k.  It’s funny because it wasn’t long ago my youngest and I went out for a jog, and I didn’t get much past the driveway before stopping and saying “let’s walk”.

And yet, I’ve also been giving into frustration.  I was so happy losing 2.5 to 3lbs a week.  It was fantastic losing 10 to 12lbs a month.  Losing 5 to 8 is just not nearly as motivational.  Particularly when so many “no loss” or “very little loss” weeks are cropping up.   I begin to go from envisioning myself reaching goal to worrying that my losses are going to stop completely….long before I even stop being obese.

Well…that’s when I have to review where I’ve come from, how much progress I’ve already made.  My friends and family say all kinds of encouraging things, call me skinny.  I could just try to maintain at 20% loss.  I could accept the new me everyone else is excited about as the final me.   I see the siren song of stagnation.

So off I go, keeping on, working, striving.  And then reflecting and appreciating and counting my blessings.  Life is good at the corder of Disappointment and Gratitude.

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